TESTING THE LIMITS OF PUNISHMENT


28 December 2005

This conversation with my then 8 year old daughter happened some time back. It regards an incident while the family was holidaying in Taiwan end of last year. We were waiting to check into a hotel after a very long day. There were more than 20 of us in the group comprising the extended Ng family and our Taiwanese host and families.

A 3 year old toddler walked up and snatched a toy / trinket my daughter was fiddling with and broke it the process. She grabbed back the thing and pushed the boy onto the floor. The boy was shocked rather than hurt and started to wail. It all happened in a matter of seconds and before any of us could intervene. Her bad behavior was a major embarrassment to the parents.

When we scolded her in the privacy of our hotel room, she too wailed loudly and started for the door saying she wanted to tell grandma that we scolded her. That was when I grabbed her and threw her onto the bed and told her to shut up. It was the first time I did that and the shock effect was enough to shut her up.

A few months after the incident.

Forest: (Accusingly) "I remember you threw me onto the bed in Taiwan. "
Me: "I'll do it again if you bully little kids and behave badly. "
Forest: "If I behave badly again, what will you do? "
Me: "If it happened again, I will throw you out in the garden. "
Forest: (Pause...think ) "And if behave badly for a third time? "
Me: "The 3rd time I will throw you out onto the road."
Forest: "I will just get back in."
Me: "No, I will also lock the gate."
Forest: "Well, I 'll climb over then."
Me: "I'll call the police."
Forest: "I can tell the police I live here."
Me: "In that case, we will move house."
Forest: :(

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